Feel like you’re not good enough?
You work hard, try to be at the best of your game, spend extra time reading/ learning/ researching, get celebrated for successes but still feel like you are a fraud? Fooling everyone around you? Having no faith that your decisions and convictions mean anything? You may have Imposter Syndrome.
Imposter Syndrome; is a term coined in 1978 by clinical psychologists Dr Pauline R. Clance and Suzanne A. Imes referring to high-achieving individuals marked by an inability to internalise their accomplishments and a persistent fear of being exposed as a “fraud”.
What does Imposter Syndrome mean?
This feeling is felt by many – particularly by women – where there is a distinct lack of self-belief in your own decisions, success and the essence of who you are.
You question your decisions, constantly seek to back up your opinions or rely on others to set the path for your future. Sound familiar?
It is a horrible feeling. Feeling like a fraud, like you don’t belong in the position you are in, the awful emotion that you are not good enough. It is draining, demotivating and can leave you feeling blue. Don’t worry you are not alone.
“Sometimes I wake up in the morning before going off to a shoot, and I think, I can’t do this. I’m a fraud.” – Kate Winslett
It is exhausting – I know – as too often feel like I don’t belong, feeling like everyone else seems to know exactly what they’re doing and in worst case scenarios I have let someone override my own knowledge as I had a distinct lack of faith in my own ability. Needless to say, I was right and was left feeling humiliated and like a failure.
Tips to improve Self-Belief
After some research and some internal pep talks, I have come up with some simple steps to help you fire that negative inner committee and re-instate a board of positive voices to support you with your every goal.
Stop comparing yourself to other people.
We are living in a world where there are hundreds of ways to compare your success to others. The power of social media means we can often look into the lives of people who seem to be smashing it. We see the smiles, lifestyle and naturally, we start to reflect on our own World.
The grass always seems to be greener on someone else’s lawn – but that doesn’t mean without a little nurture and TLC yours could not be as green.
The number one thing I have realised, especially due to the industry I am in, that comparing myself to my peers is not an option. When you stop doing this and focus that energy into pursuing your own goals – you will start to notice that these small changes set you on the path to hitting your bigger goals.
Failure does not make you a failure.
As a perfectionist, failing hits hard. However, resilience in character is what makes people the strongest.
Looking through history, you will start to see, that the greatest failures birthed the biggest successes. All you have to do is google Steve Jobs to Sir Richard Branson and even Einstein to know people don’t always get it right!
Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm. – Winston Churchill
You can’t be right every time but it is how you respond to a setback which defines who you are as a person.
Just because an idea failed does not mean you are a failure.
Nobody belongs here more than you.
Realise that nobody knows what they’re doing.
This is something that once you realise it makes your life a lot easier.
Parenting is a perfect example of this. The best parents in the world had no experience. They learn on the job, strive to be the best, put their heart and soul into and acknowledge when they mess up.
There is an element of expertise in any job but being successful relies on your own drive to achieve. Our world is constantly changing, innovating, learning and growing and no-one knows everything.
If you can keep relevant, keep reading and keep striving to achieve your goals that in itself is a success.
Always believe in yourself, because if you don’t, then who else will?