All for one and one for all?
Do you ever feel like you need to have control of everything?
Does everything have to be Perfect?
Do you feel weak when someone offers help?
Do you feel you never have time for yourself or for activities?
Or just letting someone take care of you when you usually do the caring?
This life is a stressful one and sometimes you can programme your mind to make you want to be in control of everything.
Even if you aren’t a control freak – relying on other people doesn’t cross your mind and you sometimes feel completely responsible for things that could be shared?
You get it into your head that if you don’t do it – it will never get done?
You feel you have to fix all the problems
You feel you have to help everyone else before yourself
You want to make everyone happy
If any of the above applies to you: these are my tips for letting go
Perfection is always Perfect
Making sure that everything is done to perfection can actually push you further away from a perfect situation.
When you are tired from work and you can’t be bothered to cook but you know that it’s healthier if you make it yourself and have you had your 5 a day and what about the sugar content... Head Explodes.
You spent ages putting together that event at work, every last details was planned and it was going to be perfect and last minute it got cancelled as something else came up…Devastated
Listen: Sometimes its ok to just be OK
Living a life the 80/20 allows you to live life how you want but allow for those moments when you aren’t perfect you are real. Sometimes the expectations you think people have of you are just your own expectations you put on yourself.
Living imperfectly allows you to be flexible. It frees up your energy to be happier. When things go wrong it doesn’t impact as much as your haven’t put so much effort into making everything just so.
Stop being your harshest critic and start living a life
Allow People to do things for You
I know what it feels like to do something nice for someone else. Its that warm fuzzy feeling when you see a smile on their face and you see their gratitude.
Remember that time you gave a cupcake and coffee to your friend who was having a stressful time at work?
Or cooked dinner for your flatmate as they were working late?
You helped your manager organise the dinner out as they were up to their eye balls…
Allow people to have that same feeling by letting them do it for you.
Sometimes when you stop and just take a back seat you will be surprised what nice things people have been waiting to do for you.
When you let someone else cook dinner, or organise a night or just sit back and enjoy the ride!
Allow someone else to have that feeling…
Time: Don’t Fill It
Don’t fill your day, week and weekends – give yourself time.
Life is busy enough with work, relationships, friendships, family and other activities to constantly make yourself busy.
The greatest thing you can give to anyone is time so make sure you don’t exhaust it by giving it out to everything.
If you make time for something stick to it but if you have free time let yourself relax.
Let yourself be ok with not having a full diary
You cannot be good at Everything
The beautiful thing about this world is that people are born with different strengths. What makes a great team is when you can bring in different people who all have different skills so you can make the ultimate A Team.
Sometimes you can get so wrapped up in having to do everything yourself that when you cannot do something or you don’t do something well you see it as Weakness.
STOP!
I’m going to tell you a little story and I’ll use my parents as an example
(and as my mum is my number one reader – apologies for what I am about to say)
My Mum can’t cook. She tries but it is not her strength. She can put together a fish pie and just about master a cremated chicken kiev but culinary skills she was not blessed with.
My dad on the other hand is a great cook. He can master a curry like an native, throw together a meal from the fridge and makes an incredible truckers breakfast.
Does this make my mum a lesser person – NO – because now I am going to show her strengths.
My mum does all the food shopping. She has an eye for deals and works out how to save, gage, and buy appropriately. She identifies what ingredients are needed, sources the best deals and will make sure we are never over budget. She also is a damn good washer upper!
My dad… well if he did the food shop…he would come back with just enough items for that one meal, probably with some added extras that were on sale and would be scratching his head to how he managed to spend £50 on just one meal. He wouldn’t notice the pan he cooked dinner in 3 nights ago was still there.
Be good at what you are good at and let others help you in areas where you are not.
Life is stressful in the hustle and bustle of this busy world.
Don’t let yourself get on top of yourself. The ultimate goal in this life is to be happy and if that means letting go a little bit. Then do it.
Sometimes your imperfections are what makes you perfect to all of those around you.
Live life freely and with love and stop taking on too much.
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